Why Being Your Authentic Self Might Not Be A Good Thing
The word authentic has been cropping up in a lot of my conversations lately. “Be your authentic self” and “make sure your leadership is authentic.”
I agree with the spirit of these statements, which advise that you don’t blatantly try to be someone you’re not, or go too far outside of who you are or the values that serve you.
However, there are times where being “inauthentic” is good.
As a leader, you’re always evolving, learning, growing. To be the best you can be, you should always be on your growth edge. This means:
Letting go of your “true self” when it’s part of your “old self” — a version of you that you’ve outgrown, or need to outgrow. Example: I was once an extremely nervous speaker. Now, it’s much easier. I needed to grow, and so I did, despite how awkward and inauthentic the transition felt.
Looking for tools, leadership styles and traits that might enhance your own. “Swizzle” these elements — incorporate and adapt them to your advantage.
I do this with leaders all the time, from Abraham Lincoln to Grant Cardone, taking pieces of what they’ve brought to the table and incorporating them into my leadership toolbox, applying them when needed.
Trying these new traits on for size is like breaking in a new pair of shoes — you’ve got to wear them for a time before they fit you. This is how you become the next version of your authentic self.
A prime example of when your authentic self is in flux is when you change roles and/or companies. You get to reinvent yourself with a fresh leadership style. This can be both daunting and exhilarating, especially when you’ve built up a reputation and personal brand over several years.
I had a client who worked for the same company for 19 years. He started right out of college and worked his way up through several roles. He was very well-known and well-thought of. One of the main topics he wanted coaching on was how to become more of a strategic leader vs. an operations-oriented doer. Most at his company thought of him as someone who got stuff done day-to-day, on the ground. When he moved to a new role within the company that required him to be more strategic, he had some resistance from others who kept seeing him in a logistical role. He also reached a ceiling for internal promotions because of this. For various reasons, he finally took a higher-level role at a new company. In one of our coaching sessions about preparing to onboard to the new job, he expressed concern that he’d have to build up his credibility again, with a close eye on making sure he was seen as strategic.
I talked to him about the fact that yes, in any new job there is a time for building new relationships, but he had many years of experience to draw on in order to do this effectively. He also didn’t need to go overboard to make himself appear strategic. This was built into the new role. People would assume he was a higher-level leader put in place to provide strategic direction. This was an “Aha!” moment for him. He didn’t see it himself, but once presented with the observation, he agreed with it.
The focus of our conversation then turned to getting his mindset and approach prepared for really feeling like a strategic leader. We dedicated several sessions to his approach to interactions, decisions, structuring his new team and more — all from this new perspective.
Transitioning roles can be an inflection point and opportunity to reinvent yourself — the perfect time to determine what you want your new authentic self to be and how to step into that persona.
Remember, being the best leader you can be is a constantly evolving process.
Always look for ways to up your game, refine your leadership style, and improve yourself over time. In this way, you can constantly become a more authentic leader.
For more on authenticity, I highly recommend this wonderful Harvard Business Review article by Herminia Ibarra.
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About The Author
Emily Sander is an ICF-certified leadership coach with more than 15 years of experience in the business and the author of Hacking Executive Leadership. She’s been featured in several print publications, online articles, and podcasts, including CEO Today Magazine, Leading to Fulfillment, and Leadership Powered by Common Sense.
Emily has a passion for helping business leaders reach their full potential. Go here to read her story from seasoned executive to knowledgeable coach. If you want to send Emily a quick message, then visit her contact page here.